What NOT to say on a first date...

Since it is almost Valentine's Day, I found this list of things NOT to say on a first date.  hehe  Please share any others you may know. 


Do you want to play doctor? That'll be five hundred dollars. LMAO!!!

I used to have a real bad bedwetting problem ... but the last couple of weeks I've gotten it under control.

I know we just met and this might seem a little sudden ... but could I borrow five hundred dollars?

Go ahead and Super Size - I found spare change in the sofa today.

Something tells me that you're very special ... but with medication I can usually ignore it.

I don't see my ex-girlfriend that much ... thanks to the U.S. Department of Justice."

Do you want to play doctor? That'll be five hundred dollars.

Do you want me to buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

How do you feel about back hair?

Instead of going out to dinner, let's stop by and eat with my mother.

Oh wow, your boobs are much smaller than my ex-wife's.

LOL!!!!

Do you want me to buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

LOVE IT!!

LOL.. Thank You Shelli and drpsyce, fun reading those!!!

I am lost...sorry. what is that suppose to mean? is it suppose to be funny or mean?

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  You are too cute!!!!

It would be a guy (hopefully) asking his date, "how do u feel about back hair?"

In other words he is saying he is HELLA HAIRY!  Ewwwwwww.

hehe

Oooooooo gotcha!!! really didn't know what it meant...ha ha!!! Why would anybody want to ever even ask a question like that?
muchas gracias mi amiga Shelli
C:

HeHe!!! 

Oh here are a few more-

I don't usually get many dates. 

My ex ruined my life.

I get attached very easily.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Feels good to get out, been locked up for 10 years in prison.

I'm living in my Mothers basement for now.

By the way, I like doggie style so I have somewhere to put my ash tray

i want kids immediatly!! lol woulda scared the crap outta me lol

"When you date as many prostitutes, strippers, and junkies as I do it's nice to finally be going out with a classy woman like you!"

or

" That was your sister? She has really big ta-ta's for a 14 year old."

"  Wait till my wife hears about this!"

Ok...

LOL!!!!!!  Too funny guys! 

Hey Dr, do u need an ashtray??  LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I told this one to a girl i went out with..

Their something i like about u, its not ur looks i've been out with girls much pettier than u.  Well u know what happen next....

Shelli......nope, don't smoke.  Actually, that is an old line for commedian Andrew Dice Clay.

I remember him, he was FUNNY, even with this REALLY FOUL mouth!   (I guess that shows our age, huh?)

Cute one kynettie!! hehe

"I have never felt better since taking Prozac."

"I used to come here all the time with my ex."

Hey shelly check out these pic

WOW!  Are those real?   


wait til atleast the second date

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Those are GREAT kynettie!!!!!  I laughed so loud I woke my son!!!!!

Pay no attention to the half moon shaped festering scab on my............

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!  I would probably THROW UP if a guy said that to me!!! Ewwwwww

How about these-

Can you pump the gas, I am going to run in and get some condoms.

We can't drive down this street, the court order says I have to stay 500 yards from my ex-girlfriends house

Hmmm....how about say nothing and just sit there with a rapidly twitching left eye.

In that case I will just have to twitch my right eye back and start talk and talk alone...

Doc. I love your picture and I didn't know that you are such a good looking young man... 

dr I can always count on you for a GREAT laugh!!

Here's one -

I must've slept with over four hundred people!


LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

how about taking her to  a nice lounge bar, with smooth jazz in the background, then taking place on  a sofa, and going all "al bundy style" :
hands down the pants (move your hand so that it definetly shows your grabbing something) yawn  a bit and tell her: woman! go fedge me  a  beer!
and bring some nuts!

" I think I'm falling in love with you "
" Wanna come back to my trailor? "
" If we have sex tonight, you don't have to worry about getting me pregnant- I already am."
" my girlfriend would never see this movie"
" Excuse me for a minute...I have to apply my Zovirax "
" No, I'm not a convicted murderer. I never got caught. "

I hope on my first date i get some.Its been 6 years and i need to know if things still work.

Thanks Wnanhee....now, could you starting putting your picture back up?????

How about...."Do you want to see the giant mole my Doctor said to have removed 3 years ago?"

I am sooooooo much in debt!!!!!!

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! You guys are CRACKING ME UP!!